Sometimes i just run out of places to Hide

WHERE DO I RUN AND HIDE???????????????????????????????????

I hate feeling like this,, damn,,, it will probably pass by tomorrow, so i gues i´ll just go to sleep,,

but i have to say it,, i am so damn tired , i cant be there cos i have to put up,, with her,, then i can go home cos i have to put up with this one too,,, so where do I go?,,, i need those RCI to stop sending me living aboard curses, and send me my shipment assigment,,, i wanna go now to that freaking small cabin, and recharge my bob marley power!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I had a hard week ,, i know clau is like that, and will allways be and have allways been,...... i love her to death, care very much for her and consider her a dear friend,,, but sometimes i am just not in the humor to put up with her being heavy with me,,, i dont know what does she have to prove when we are around other friends that she feels like she has to treat me like shit and win a competition... but when we are alone she is soo sweet,,,,

Well yeh,, sometimes i just dont feel like being treated that way and put up with it,,as I usually do cos i know she is not allways like that and that is just her personality as much as it is mine interrupting people when they are talking which is also pretty rude.

But what makes me more angry is that she feels insulted by me saying to her i dont want to put up with that today.... and her talking behind me,,, awfull thing to do,,, then saying she is angry with me and doesnt want to talk about it ,, when i am trying to do what she is not doing and talk directly to her...not behind her.

damn i am the one that should be hell angry for having to put up allways with so much mistreatment in that imaginary competition she seems to have with me.

Anyway,, i will try again this week to tell her this , cos i allways think there is no other way to solve things than speak about it and communicate,.. she probably doesnt even know what she is doing wrong...

I take the liberty to write here cos i know there is a rare chance she checks this blog, If you do claudia,, you know i love you but we seriuosly need to talk about this. I know the only person who rarely reads this blog is my little brother,, yes i am talking about you Cesar,,, and i hope you do not speak this with claudia or tell her to check here... Anyway i plan to talk to her,, whenever she feels like.

SO,, damn day,, having to put up either with mistreatment,, or with bad humor,, then i come home looking for some peace,, but NO,,, I forget why do i leave this house in the first place... i have to come home,, and put up,, with the only mistreatment that i cant complain about..... my brother,,, he is sick,, there is no other way,,i have to put up with it because i love him and I want him safe... SO as i am listening about it and just nooding like a fu"··$%!!!! robot, i am thinking, What the fu!"·$??,,, where do i go,,to be just in peace for a bit??????????... its too late to go to the movies... maybe just the park around the corner but it is night time and i am afraid of the place and cold... I am too freaking old,, i should have been living by myself long ago,,,that, if i had any money for it and i wasnt a freaking important piece on my brother´s health.

Now i hope,, bitching about it in this blog,, makes me feel better by finally saying it and makes me forget by tomorrow... SO,,,, so loong and thanks for all the fish